Thursday, July 29, 2010

Oh dear.

I've just been back and read over some recent posts from other members. How could I have missed the pretention for soo long!!??  I have made some of the very best friends EVER (YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE!!!) because of that place but I do feel it is time to withdraw and retreat now. I don't feel I can contribute anything without being jumped on (sadly not by Seth!) x Maybe its my problem, maybe I've grown out of it over the last year. I'll miss the deds, but I know Seth appreciates our support anyway. Have had so many special times that can't be mentioned, and that's good enough for me.  So if anyone is bothered I shall be here and on FB, and I shall lurk there but that's all.

xx
There you go
You're always so right
It's all a big show
It's all about you

You think you know
What everyone needs
You always take time
to criticize me (and anyone else who doesn't share your view!) The bold bits are mine. x

Hmmm, these lyrics seem to sum up someone who I apparently upset on a certain forum recently. I know that I'm not the only one who is peed off by his posts but he decided to ignore the others and pick on me. He is a boastful self centred egotist with an over inflated sense of his own importance - ahh, that feels better.  Oh, and I'm pretty sure it is sour grapes as he is a failed recording artist.
 
"Could you point out where else you think I have come across so negatively?" he asked. I did, he wouldn't accept it, even though I did say it was personal to me.
 
"I reckon I've generated countless sales of his records and gigs over the years (pre-Mercury) but as I have said I feel priviledged to have been exposed to such great music, I have such high expectations."
I pointed out how much I have also supported Seth - he ignored that! (Oh, and he can't spell 'privileged').
 
"Again I go back to the point that I am passionate about this music and pulling it apart and getting under its skin is what I enjoy - I started sound engineering before I was 10 and have spent many hours socialising with musicians. I am so enthusiastic about Seth and his band plus this genre of music that it hurts!" Does he think I am not passionate? I have said I am not interested in pulling the music apart but he should check out the threads that do. Again, the boasting - its all 'me, me, me' or 'I, I, I ' - whoopee doo! Good for you. Sound engineering at 10 - what do you want? A medal?
 
He continued to lambast in his self important bragging "I am the best person" tone. Said he never said anything negative about Seth!!??  By criticising the music - in a "I wouldn't have done this, I wouldn't have done that" kind of a way, surely that is being negative, or have I got the wrong end of the stick (as he accused me of on a different occasion!)
 Debating whether to post the whole sorry saga on here really - could do but don't think any one is THAT interested. He says he recieved 'PMs of encouragment', well, guess what, so did I, but did not feel the need to brag about it! This is the type of person I do not need in my life, he can carry on in is own self centred little bubble, but he has made me think twice about posting on forum much. I'm obviously constantly misunderstood and possibly not even the type of person the forum really wants. They blatantly do not wish to have outspoken, straight talking members who says it as it is.
 
Anyway, just needed to get that out of my head and have a little rant. I refuse to continue the fruitless pm convo, he and I are obviously never going to get on, and I truly hope I never meet him at a gig.
 
Anyway - to cheer me up, here is my Seth pic for the day!
 
 

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Right, I think I'll give up trying to make this anything about my art and craft - maybe I'll do a different blog for that, tho I can't promise that Seth won't creep in there as well! xx

Some brilliant news, I have a proper job!!!   Yay!!  Doing what I love the most, working with teenagers in the classroom at our local college. I cannot believe I actually got the job. Start 31 August and am really quite excited. Sod Broadwater, just can't wait for Hazel to do her GCSEs and leave now.

Other exciting things.....SETH! At Chagstock on his home turf, and they were effing BRILLIANT! xx

Few pics - as ever!


I shall be back in a bit with a Guilfest report and a bit more of our Chagstock adventure!

Saturday, July 10, 2010

Well, things have moved on a bit for me emotionally - I am feeling slightly more positive but I have no idea why as nothing has actually changed. Maybe its the sunshine! Maybe its because I have had some good experiences with people, maybe its just because............

Don't know, but it can only be a good thing.

Was lucky enough to be able to go the Seth Lakemans 'Album Launch without the Album' last week, in a very hot, smelly and rather sweaty Jazz Cafe in Camden. It was a good'un with 2 special guests DBG, who I've met before and a guest vocalist called Olivia Chaney. I have to say that I didn't like the addition of female vocals on the song 'Changes', they are present on the album version as well and just sound a bit harsh and out of place, but it was interesting to see it performed like that live. Tho I do hope the boys go back to performing it live without them, it is just such a beautifully simple song, with the pizzicato violin and Simons amazing mellow 'ticking' drumbeat.

'Special' people got VIP treatment upstairs away from the crowd of  the hot, sweaty  unwashed! That is never going to be me I'm afraid, down and dirty,  dancing and singing along in front of the band is where I want to be, and should I ever be 'special' that is still where'll you'll find me!

Few pics here -






Monday, July 05, 2010

Hmmmmm,

Still wondering when I'm going to stop feeling shit. I'm really trying to see the positive in things but when others control external decisions, it is not easy truly. If I could simply move to another house, I would, make a fresh start, hubby could look for a new job away from The School, I could get a new job and everything would be dandy! Unfortunately, it is not that easy, because lack of money makes it impossible to move forward or do anything. So I have to watch friends, or people that I know, do all the things I want to be able to do, have the freedom I want to have, enjoy themselves in the way I would like to be able to but I can't, and if it was my fault maybe it would be different, but it isn't and I really feel that no one actually seems to care.

They say the 'right' things and then proceed to have the time of their lives - not that they shouldn't, of course they should, good luck to them, and I hope they never have to go through times like I'm having to live through. Trouble is, no matter what they say, they can't really understand and so they get fed up with a whinging cow like me - fair enough, I probably would as well.

So how do I continue to look on the bright side when there doesn't appear to be a bright side and hasn't been for about 20 years? Answers on a postcard would be gratefully recieved. xx